Why Aspergians Hate Large Group Interactions

A question many people ask about Asperger Syndrome is: Why do Aspergians hate interacting with large groups of people?  To answer this question, I think of a mathematical model of the number of different connections between computers in a network.  In a social context, we treat each person involved in the interaction as a node in the network.  Each of these connections is bidirectional.  As one can clearly see in the table below, the number of connections increases in a combinatorial fashion as more people join the group.  Therefore, it becomes increasingly difficult to pay full attention to what everyone is saying to one another.

# of People                        # of Communication Links

2	0 + 1 = 1
3	0 + 1 + 2 = 3
4	0 + 1 + 2 + 3 = 6
5	0 + 1 + 2 + 3 + 4 = 10
6	0 + 1 + 2 + 3 + 4 + 5 = 15
…	…
n	= n(n-1)/2

Asperger House

The transition from high school to college is a momentous occasion for any student.  This transition often means leaving the familiar comforts of home and family for the unfamiliar environment of a college campus, often hundreds, or even thousands, of kilometers away.   This move involves not only leaving the familiar and supportive home environment, but learning a new set of skills that affect every aspect of daily living.  These skills include making the right choices about food intake, exercise, and sleep patterns, dealing with various health problems, as well as creating and following a schedule that changes on a daily basis and is dictated by classes, assignments, and social pressures.  I would like to share some of my own experiences from living in Oglesby Hall during the mid-1980s to give you some perspective.

Moving into a residence hall like Oglesby Hall for the first time is a very stressful experience for any freshman, but is very traumatic for an Aspergian leaving his or her parents for the first time.  The experience of living with another guy in a 3 m by 4 m room, sharing a common bathroom with 60 other guys, and eating in a dining hall with 1,400 of my “closest friends and neighbors” is not one that I want to endure again.  If I only could have explained to my roommate, my Resident Advisor, and to the other 58 guys on my floor, about my condition and what I was going through, they would have learned to understand and accept me for who I was at the time.  I wanted to interact with my peers but I had no idea how to do so.

Aspergian students at college or university, especially freshmen or transfer students, are under much more stress than are their Neurotypical classmates.  In addition to the pressures of our studies in the classroom, we have the added pressures of learning how to live with our peers.  Residence hall staff, as well as professors, teaching assistants, and academic advisors, would be well advised to learn all they can about Asperger Syndrome in order to make the transition to campus life smoother for their Aspergian students.  Judging by my personal experience at the University of Illinois in the mid-1980s, Aspergians are much more likely to fail academically due to the stress of dual curricula than due to a lack of intellectual capability. 

I propose the establishment of a housing unit at the University of Illinois for students who have Asperger Syndrome and other Autism Spectrum Disorders.  Asperger House would be jointly operated by the Division of Housing and the Division of Disability Resources and Educational Services.  Residents at Asperger House (a conceptual name) would receive the academic and social support services they need to successfully complete their education…in and out of the classroom.  Resident Advisors and other staff members would receive special training in the many challenges related to Asperger Syndrome and how they can best help Aspergian students relate to their Neurotypical classmates and professors.  Among these challenges are the fact that many Aspergians also have coexisting conditions such as anxiety, depression, attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD).

While it is possible to locate Asperger House on a designated floor of a University Residence Hall, it would not be the optimal living situation for students with Asperger Syndrome.  The excessive exposure to other students would be too stressful for Aspergian students to bear, often resulting in behavioral anomalies.  A vacant fraternity house, once properly renovated, would be ideal for such a housing unit.  Each resident of Asperger House would have his or her own room because a single room can provide a much-needed refuge in an otherwise stressful life.  However, we must be careful to mitigate the Aspergian desire for isolation from their peers. 

Many Aspergians are also very sensitive to various sensory stimuli that would not so adversely affect their neurotypical peers.  A common example would be the flicker and hum of a fluorescent light bulb.  It is critical that we reduce or eliminate unnecessary distractions form the academic and living environment.

Among the amenities at Asperger House would be a computer lab, a small but well-equipped gym, a TV lounge, a laundry room, a dining hall, classrooms for in-house programs, and a social interaction lab.  An Academic Advising Team would be in regular contact with the various deans, department chairs, and professors to assist them in optimizing the learning experience for their Aspergian students.  A Psychologist would guide the in-house staff members in assessing and providing for the various counseling needs of the residents.  Future Resident Advisors would ideally be upperclassmen and/or graduate students who are on the Spectrum themselves and can utilize their own personal experience to guide the incoming students.

Unlike at the Residence Halls, the residents of Asperger House would be encouraged to live there year-round in order to maintain continuity in their lives.  The in-house programs would utilize the latest in computer technology.  For example, I would like to see the “Social Stories” comic strips, often used to teach children social interaction skills, converted into a Virtual Reality game to involve all of a student’s senses in the learning process.

Another critical component of Asperger House is the creation of a transitional program to assist the students in starting their new careers and post-college lives.  Among the many tools that can be used to guide the students in their career choices are the Strong Interest Inventory Profile and the Myers Briggs Type Indicator.  With the right education and support programs, people with Asperger Syndrome and other Autism Spectrum Disorders can contribute their many and diverse talents and abilities to the benefit of the greater society.

Aspergians in Love - Not a Pretty Sight

Much to the surprise of many people, Aspergian men have the same love of women that neurotypical men have.  We have many of the same dreams and desires for loving, caring relationships with women.  Beacuse we often lack the basic social interaction skills needed to initiate or maintain such relationships, we are often afraid to approach anyone.  When we summon the courage make an attempt to reach out to women to whom we are attracted, even on a platonic level, our efforts are often met with rejection...and even threats of violence or legal action.  Such rejection further reinforces our reluctance to interact with others.  Once people come to know and understand us, they will find that we are not as "creepy" as they might make us out to be.  This blog post will hopefully give you an insight on the problems in this arena that we Aspergians often face when reaching out to others.

It would stand to reason that many an Aspergian man has been accused of behaviors could be construed as sexual harassment or sexual assault at some point in his adolescent or adult life, even when his intentions were otherwise.  Let me make an important legal distinction here.  Sexual harassment typically involves either an inappropriate eye gaze or an out of sequence remark.  This can also include well-intentioned remarks taken out of their intended context.  Sexual assault, a more serious criminal offense, involves any nonconsensual physical contact of a sexual nature.  While neurotypical men rely on subtle nonverbal cues from their partners to obtain consent, it is strongly recommended that Aspergian men overtly ask questions to obtain consent...as awkward as it may sound.  At Antioch College in Yellow Springs, Ohio, for example, such overt questioning to obtain explicit verbal consent is actually mandated by the school's Sexual Offense Prevention Policy.  This policy was adopted in 1992 after two female students were date-raped during the prior school year...at a college with a total enrollment of fewer than 700 students.

The real tragedy is that every red-blooded American male, whether he is single or married, or whether he is gay or straight, is increasingly vulnerable to allegations of sexual misconduct, wherever he may happen to be.  It is indeed a very sorry state of affairs when we cannot check out the beauties on the beach, at a club, or anywhere else, let alone approach one and ask her for a date, without the very serious threat of being brought up on charges...and not necessarily by the lady herself.  Even a platonic friendship or a business relationship with any woman can be very dangerous, as my personal experience has clearly proven to me over the years.  There have been a few cases where I had such a basic platonic friendship, and very nearly my life, ended by a jealous husband or boyfriend...even when I was involved with someone else at the time.  What's wrong with this picture?

The mere allegation of any sexual misconduct, proven or not, can have devastating, and often irreversible, effects on the lives, careers, relationships, and reputations of many an innocent man.  Unlike those accused of other types of crimes, those accused of any type of sexual offense, from verbal harassment to forcible rape to extramarital adultery and everything in between, are often denied the rights of due process.  These rights include the right to presumption of innocence until proven guilty and the right to face one's accuser due to "Rape Shield Laws" in some states.  These men are usually presumed guilty until proven innocent.  Worse yet, they are not always given a fair opportunity to defend themselves against the charges, let alone prove their innocence, in a court of law due to the stigma attached to such offenses.

The simple fact that a man is married or in a committed relationship can make him even more vulnerable to false allegations of sexual misconduct that a single man would be due to the additional threats of blackmail or other types of extortion.  Call me paranoid if you will, but this situation can happen to any man, anytime, anywhere.  While these allegations can also be made against women, the great majority of those accused are men.  There must be an immediate cease-fire in the Battle of the Sexes so that we can learn to appreciate and respect each other as people.  Is that too much to ask?

The point I intend to make here is that it is critically important to understand that Aspergian men are far more likely to be victimized by women than are neurotypical men.  My personal experience shows that we are far more likely to prey than predator.  I have been victimized by several women with whom I had been involved on various levels over the years.  They typically wanted to use me for money and/or someone with whom to cheat on their husbands or boyfriends, the existence of whom I usually learned about only from third parties.  Some of them were drug addicts who wanted an enabler who would not only give them money to buy their drugs, but take them to meet their drug dealers.  Drug addicts are desperate enough to resort to any lie, threat, or scam to get their next fix.  It comes as no great surprise that I have developed a serious problem in trusting other people, especially women.  Whenever someone does gain my trust, she usually takes advantage of me in one way or another.  My greatest fear is that someone will take something I may say to her in confidence, such as the fact that I have Asperger Syndrome, and use it against me later on for her own personal gain.

My personal message to neurotypical people in general and to women in particular is, "We are much more afraid of you than you are of us."

Recognize The Sensory Triggers

It is a known fact that many Aspergians are very sensitive to certain external stimuli and may react negatively to stimuli which would not so adversely affect their neurotypical peers.  Such stimuli include loud noises as well as certain colors, aromas, and textures.  A common irritant is the flicker and low-pitched hum of a flourescent light bulb.  Environment is an important factor in Aspergian behavior.  When evaluating a particular behavioral anomaly, such as a temper tantrum, self-stimulation, or other inappropriate behavior pattern, it is important to consider the following questions:

1. When and under what circumstances do we observe a behavioral anomaly most frequently and/or in its most extreme form?  Consider the following factors:

• Environment
• Size of the room
• Number of people present
• Noise level and type of noise
• Why we were there at the time
• What else was going on

2. Was there another incident or situation preceding the current incident?

3. What was our physical state at the time of the incident?

4 Did the place or situation have a history for us (such as the doctor's office where we had a flu shot or the mall where the fire alarm sounded)?

5. What were our expectations at the time?

6. Were there any unexpected changes?

Conversely, it is also very important to consider these very same environmental factors when we feel and perform at our best.  We want to recreate these environmental states for optimal performance.

What is Asperger Syndrome?

Asperger Syndrome (AS for short) is a neurological condition characterized by a lack of social understanding, limited ability to have a reciprocal conversation, and an intense interest in a particular subject.  The best way to understand this condition is to think of it as describing someone who perceives and thinks of the world very differently to other people.

Asperger Syndrome is caused by a dysfunction of specific structures and systems in the brain.  Research studies involving the use of brain imaging technology and neuropsychological tests reveal structural and functional  differences in specific regions of the brain.  These differences are most likely caused by abnormalities in embryonic cells during fetal development that affect brain structure and wiring and then goes on to affect the neural circuits that control thought and behavior.  To give you a better analogy, let the wiring in a house represent the wiring in the brain.  In a neurotyical (or "normal") brain, flipping a light switch would turn a light on or off.  In an Aspergian (someone with AS) brain, however, flipping that same light switch would turn the radio or garage door opener on or off.  We could reroute the circuitry in our brains, but that would result in a significantly longer processing and response time.  Such is the case when we learn social interaction skills.  Therefore, we take longer to respond to social cues because we have to consciously think about everything we say or do.

It is critically important to understand that Asperger Syndrome is a neurological condition resulting from anomalies in the physical brain rather than from emotional or behavioral problems.  However, such problems most certainly can, and often do, result from the condition.  An Aspergian has no more control overhow he or she views the world and interprets what is seen heard, felt, or understood than has someone who has suffered a mild stroke or developed Alzheimer's disease.  Asperger Syndrome is a serious, lifelong condition that requires individualized expert intervention and should be treated as such.  While some people describe the condition as a "mild" form of Autism, there is certainly nothing "mild" about the many challenges that we Aspergians face on a daily basis.

It is also known that Autism Spectrum Disorders, including Asperger Syndrome, tend to run in families.  Additional evidence of the genetic link to AS was observed in higher incidences of family members, especially fathers, who have similar behavioral symptoms, but in a limited form.  While a specific gene for AS has yet to be identified, the most recent research indicates that there are most likely a common group of genes whose variations make an individual susceptible to the condition.

Coping Strategies That Work (Most of the Time)

It is critical to note here that the behavioral symptoms of Asperger Syndrome are most likely to appear in times of stress or neurological overload.  Over the years, I have developed a few strategies to calm me down in such situations.  Please keep in mind that these strategies usually, but not always, work well for me but may not necessarily work for other Aspergians.   The coping strategies I use most often are:

1.      Daily Workouts

2.      Tanning Sessions

3.      Long Road Trips

4.      Architecture

5.      Music

It is a proven fact that when we look better, we feel better about ourselves; and when we feel better about ourselves, we usually perform better.  I find that daily workouts at a local gym, preferably in the early morning, to be very effective in reducing stress and anxiety as well as in improving my overall appearance.  Under typical conditions, I work out every day except in cases of illness, injury, or travel.

As I have mentioned earlier, many Aspergians suffer from coexisting conditions such as anxiety and depression.  Every year, in addition to the anxiety and depression, I also have to deal with another type of depression known as Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) during the winter months.  In addition to darkening my complexion, I find that twice-weekly visits to a local tanning salon help me to alleviate the depression.  The ultraviolet radiation from the tanning beds, as well as natural sunlight, also helps the human body produce Vitamin D through photosynthesis.  To minimize the risks of skin cancer and other skin damage, moderation is the key.  I often wonder if the sunscreens we use while at the beach or the lotions we use at the tanning salon could actually be carcinogenic.

I have always been a Road Warrior at heart, hence the domain name for my personal website, RoadWarrior7.net.  Whenever time, weather, and funds permit, I like to pack my bags, fuel up my car, and take a nice long road trip to clear my mind.  Even when I was delivering pizzas, I often volunteered to take the more distant deliveries and my bosses and colleagues could never understand why.  My greatest thrill during my long tenure at Papa John’s Pizza in Champaign, Illinois was the opportunity to take several week-long business trips to locations in Southern Indiana where I trained new drivers.  The fact that the company paid for all of my food, fuel, and lodging expenses made these trips even more enjoyable.  I even spent several summers as a guest driver in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina and used the experiences from these road trips as the basis for my two novels.  Whenever I take to the open road, I feel an incredible sense of peace.

One of my focused interests is architecture.  I wanted to be an architect when I was growing up, but I was unable to take the prerequisite drafting courses in high school.  I majored in Computer Science instead.  I like to wander around hotels, office buildings, and the like in order to check them out from an architectural perspective.  When I delivered pizzas in Myrtle Beach, I had plenty of opportunities to explore different hotels while on the job.  Whenever I watch a sports event on TV, I like to pay close attention to the design of the stadium or arena.  Whenever I find myself in an overload condition, I might grab a pen and paper and draw some sketches or floor plans of places I have seen.  If only architectural firms such as HK and Populous would see some of my drawings, they might even offer me a job.  I like to draw other pictures as well.

Another coping technique that usually works for me is to listen to some good music, usually classic rock or smooth jazz.  I like to pick up a guitar or sit down at a piano every chance I get and play whatever comes to mind.  For example, I like to sit down at an electronic keyboard just before a date and pretend that I am the organist at the ballpark just before the big game.  Like the architectural drawings, it also has a calming effect on me.  A music store is like a playground to me.  I have a dream of having my own music studio where I would be able to compose and record my own music.  My ideal musical arsenal would consist of two full-size electronic keyboards, a Vocoder (a voice-altering synthesizer), an M4000D Digital Mellotron, a set of Taurus pedals, a Fender Stratocaster electric guitar, a Fender Precision Bass guitar, Oscar Schmidt acoustic 6-string, 12-string, and bass guitars, and an electronic drum kit.  I would also like to one day purchase 5.1 surround sound recording software for my computer.  

An Aspergian View of Personality Testing for Employment

One of the greatest challenges for any Aspergian is landing a job that is appropriate for our level of 
education and talents. In addition to online job applications and background checks that are becoming 
increasingly invasive of our personal privacy, including credit checks and social network profiling, 
personality pre-employment screening is quickly becoming a common feature in corporate America today. 
Awaiting job applicants at many major retailers such as Costco, Pizza Hut, Sears, Best Buy, and Target 
are 100 questions designed to measure personality compatibility before an interview is even scheduled. A 
major roadblock in the job-hunting process for most Aspergians is the dreaded personality test that is part 
of most online employment applications. 

The 100 questions on the personality test range from comfort levels in crowds to an applicant’s opinion 
about the legal system. Applicants are given a score- color-coded green, yellow, or red- that indicates 
which applicants are worth interviewing in person, with little regard for actual work experience. I 
downloaded a list of the questions on the Unicru test, along with an answer key, from the Internet and 
studied each question carefully. The choice of responses for each question is "Strongly Agree”, 
“Somewhat Agree”, “Somewhat Disagree”, or “Strongly Disagree.” All of the correct answers are either 
of the extreme choices, “Strongly Agree,” or “Strongly Disagree”. There is no allowance for moderation 
of opinion on the test. The test clearly places a strong emphasis on conformity, diplomacy, and 
extroversion…which are not Aspergian traits. Those applications which score in the red zone are not 
even considered fit enough to be sent to the manager’s inbox for consideration. Such hiring managers 
cannot even consider interviewing, much less hiring, many very talented applicants because their test 
scores do not conform to the profile sought in the screening process. 

My personal experience with this testing is completely negative. I submitted dozens of online 
applications and was never called for an interview. I answered every question as honestly as I could and 
failed the test every time as a result of my honesty. Many people around me tell me that I should cheat on 
the test in order to get a job, but money means absolutely nothing to me if I cannot maintain my own 
integrity. There is no proper way to determine employment eligibility based on a system of “right” or 
“wrong” answers to questions that are highly subject to opinion, without an applicant having an 
opportunity to explain his or her answers. These personality tests offer no such opportunity. An even 
greater flaw is the fact that there is no opportunity to discuss one’s answers with the hiring manager as the 
application never reaches the manager’s desk because the test criteria screen it out. Therefore, I actively 
avoid applying to companies that use personality testing as a pre-employment screening tool.